Bible interpretation translation guide

Do you sometimes suspect that you’re not properly understanding the Bible commentary that you’re reading?  Fear not, for now you can use Raskolnikov’s Bible Interpretation Translation Guide® to navigate other people’s theological titbits.

‘You can make the Bible say anything you want’
Translation: ‘I don’t read the Bible’

‘The Bible isn’t a textbook on ___’
‘I would like to ignore what the Bible has to say about ___’

‘The author did not have a modern understanding of ___’
‘I would like to ignore what the Bible has to say about ___’

‘A few isolated passages seem to suggest ___’
‘The Bible clearly teaches ___, but I don’t agree with ___ so it can’t be teaching ___ really’

‘In the light of what the Bible has to say about ___, we cannot take this passage at face value’
‘In the light of parts of the Bible that I like, I will not take parts of the Bible that I don’t like at face value’

‘Fundamentalist’
See here

‘The author was constrained by the culture in which he was living’
‘Inspiration of scripture? Pah!’

‘This is mysterious’
‘This is unwelcome’

This guide is to be taken with a pinch of salt. I do not want to suggest that every time anyone says something like one of these quotations in bold, they must be pulling the hermeneutical move that follows it. You will undoubtedly be able to find a situations where, for instance, someone says that the Bible is not a textbook on some subject and is not only dead right (the Bible isn’t a textbook on anything, IMO) but also making a valid point.  And some things are genuinely mysterious.  With that caveat, though, I get wary whenever I hear entries in this guide.

Any suggested additions to the guide?